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So Much So Little

20 Mar

I have said it before and I will say it again and again and again in the time and years to come. There are SO many things that I want to do and SO little time to be able to do all those things that I really want to do. I love knitting, counted cross stitch, letter writing, cooking, movies, writing in my blog and so many other things. I have about a hundred different knitting projects that I want to try, at least 5 or 6 different counted cross stitch patterns that I REALLY want to make, I don’t get to write letters to friends and family like I used to (hell I don’t even get to email people half the time), I enjoy cooking, but I don’t have a lot of time, space, money or energy to cook and when I do it is usually for many more people that just my son and myself (it is really difficult to cook for just the two of us), I would love to have more time to work on this blog and making it the kind of blog that I want and to some degree need it to be.

I could go on and on about all the the things that I want to do, but I can’t and shouldn’t forget all of the things that I am already doing and already trying to find time to work on. I had a moment this morning where I thought and even said to my friend Kamria that I am probably trying to do too much because on top of and before everything else in my world there is my son. From the moment I found out I was pregnant what is best for him has always been my first and foremost concern. As sad as it would make me I would drop everything that I enjoy doing if that is what I needed to do for my son. I do have concerns about failing my son either because I am doing too much or not doing enough. One of my biggest fears is that I will fail him. I addressed all of this and more in my previous blog entry of Super Mom or Super Bomb (if you haven’t read that entry I hope you will check it out). Honestly, how am I ever going to do all the things that I need to do and still be able to do all the things that I really want to do.

I am a firm believer in multitasking and I think I am generally a pretty good multitasker, but you can only multitask so many things at a time, unless you have more than 1 pair of arms or the ability to clone yourself at will and if anyone out there knows how to start cloning yourself at will I would appreciate your willingness to teach me that skill. My ability to multitask is definitely being tested now that I am a single mother and I am going to have to continue to develop that ability if I am going to have any chance to be able to do the things that I need to do, let alone the ones that I really want to do. Regardless of how strong my multitasking skills become I have no doubt that forever and always I will feel like there is SO much to do and SO little time to do it in.

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